Miss Annabelle – The Comfort Zone. How Do I Keep My Relationship from Getting Too Comfortable?
“The Comfort Zone” - what comes to mind when you hear those words? Do you think of sweat pants, un-plucked eyebrows, and left over take out containers in the living room?
The Comfort Zone can be a fun and exciting place initially! It is great to be able to relax around your partner and let them share in the less sexy and romantic parts of life, knowing that they like you for you.
However, couples often reach a point where they wonder if they are too comfortable. So how do you know?
Often when a couple is too comfortable, they will ignore their personal hygiene routines. They already have a long term partner, so why bother?
While your partner will love you no matter what, taking the time to look good boosts self-esteem and lets your partner know you want to look good for them. It is an important part of relationship maintenance.
It is great to be able to ‘let it all hang out’ every once in a while, but if you are both dressed like you just got back from the gym every night, you might be too comfortable.
Another thing that happens as a relationship gets cozy is communication starts to get pushed aside. Family, bills, household maintenance, and other factors influence your communication.
That’s just part of life, but there are things you can do to bring communication back into the picture. Making an effort to engage in ‘couple talk’ is one. Flirting, compliments, favorite memories, and things you like about your partner are all ways to talk about the two of you as a unit. That can rekindle sparks and reduce tensions between you which makes it easier to talk about the tougher stuff.
Be honest with your partner! Communicate your needs. Even if they’ve known you for a long time, they aren’t psychic.
Whens the last time you grabbed a cup of coffee with a friend? If you’re struggling to remember, you might be getting too comfortable.
Often couples push aside other relationships and hobbies as they enter the comfort zone. Time alone together is great, but so is time apart!
Pursuing outside interests breaks up the routine which helps keep things from getting boring and gives you things to talk about. Who wants to hear the same things every day?
Look at your bathroom, is there acne cream next to the tampons and aftershave? Dirty clothes tossed around? You might be getting too comfortable.
One of the best parts of any good relationship is feeling like you have nothing to hide. However, being discreet about certain things can add a sexy mystery to the relationship.
It’s hard to picture getting intimate with someone you just saw pop a zit, isn’t it?
Your partner should be your best friend and love you no matter what, but there are some things even friends don’t share! It’s important to be yourself, but keep them guessing!
Above all be open, honest, and tolerant with your partner. It is the trifecta of any good relationship.
Schedule a night out for every night in. A dress up day for each dress down day. Talk about your hobbies, eat good food.
Most importantly, communicate communicate communicate! It will keep your relationship happy and comfortable well into your golden years.