Saturday was like any Saturday when I didn't have anything going on. I had a list of things to do around the house and errands to run. When I came back from errands someone had dumped a trampoline in our backyard.

I dropped all of the shopping bags on the kitchen table and saw out the back patio window that two of my kids were bounding up and down.

"What the hell?" I thought.

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Out loud I hollered for my wife, who was somewhere in the house.

"Crystal?" I called. "What the hell is in the backyard?"

"I have no idea how it got there," she said. "We were in the house, I was cleaning, kids were on their screens, and Rockley was trying to get some milk when he said 'Mom! Come here!'"

According to my wife, he saw the blue poles and net sticking up and he recognized a trampoline back there. He immediately took off his shoes and ran out and started jumping.

"Someone just dumped it in the backyard?" I asked. "It looks brand new!"

"I know, it's the darndest thing," Crystal said. "Somebody must have bought it and their husband said 'No way, you aren't killing my grass with that thing' and they just decided someone might as well use it."

"I noticed something else when I got home," I said to Crystal. "What are all those big cardboard boxes by the recycling bin?"

"The hammock and the inflatable dinosaur costumes for the wine party," she said.

So now I have to figure out how to take a free trampoline away from my kids so it doesn't kill my grass and not make myself the meanest dad ever.

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